When a child complains that they have lost strength in the their arm, you might suggest that they have lifted something too heavy or strained a muscle. When Mikee tells me this, at first I paid no mind. The next day she sent me a message that her arm was really weak. My brain scrambles to find an explanation. I defer to Neurology and still have the number memorized. I am told she needs to come in. I am right by the hospital now but Mik is 35 kilometers away - so a round trip of 70. I ask if after school would work and he says she needs to come in immediately. He is concerned it could be a stroke or something serious. Panic mode sets in. I can feel my brain take over my body mechanically while I try to remain calm. We get in to Emergency as quickly as I can safely get there. It is all too familiar. She is hooked up to IV's, Neuro tests are done every few minutes. Our story repeated again and again. Mik is efficient. She knows what to do. Finger to nose, nose to finger. Push, pull, eyes left, right, left right. Shoulders up and down.
Next is a CT scan. We are in so quickly, I know they are concerned. In just moments our anxiety is released like the prick of a pin in a balloon. There is no cause for concern. We gather our things, wait for her IV to get removed and head home in the rain and dark.
Guilt almost invaded me. Guilt at rushing her in, unnecessary tests, perhaps unwarranted concern. The explanation was that she probably had lifted something too heavy or strained a muscle. But who can know?